Out of the shadows and into the sunshine
I went through a trauma when I was 18 years old. I had normal counselling afterwards and thought that I was ok. But whatever I thought, there were things that I couldn’t help. Like flashbacks in the day, or freezing suddenly, or feeling afraid for no apparent reason. I could rationalise it all I wanted, such as it was not my fault, but that wasn’t how I felt. What I did feel was that there was a hole in me where something had been ripped out.
I approached EMDR with caution, not really sure how to handle blue lights flashing up and down a black bar. It was a slow process, taking a lot of getting used to. The thoughts and emotions were locked deep inside me, like a box with the lid firmly slammed down. But each week, Gerry patiently prised the lid open for a peek, and patiently went fishing through my box to find the angle to open it up. Somewhere between two vibrating tappers in my hand and those blue lights my memory let go of the fears, and the lies, and attached to the truth instead.
Now even the pain has receded. Instead of being and open bleeding wound, it feels only that I have stubbed my toe, and although I can still remember the table I stubbed it on, the table is not here in the room – it is just a memory of a past event. It no longer overwhelms me.
Gerry was calm, and happy to accept the challenge, to keep working on it and not give up. The EMDR has changed my reaction to the trauma in a way that normal counselling couldn’t. Thank you so much Gerry for your time and efforts. It is so very much appreciated.
A Client (2012) This person is in their 20's and used 20 meetings.